Question: Beloved Osho, If one experiences or understands inwardly the deep feeling of becoming As a dry leaf to be moved only by the existence itself, then how can one Push oneself to breathe or jump or do anything at all but lie flat on the Earth and dissolve?
Osho : First, to experience and to understand are two different things. If you experience this there is no need to ask the question – just lie down flat on the ground and dissolve. Why ask the question? This is an act, you are doing something. No dry leaf has ever asked. But the very question shows that intellectually you understand, but you have not experienced any such thing – and intellectual understanding is not understanding at all. Intellectual understanding is just appearance of understanding, it is not understanding.
Why do I say this? I will read the sentence, you will feel why. ”If one experiences or understands….” You cannot use the ”or” because they are not the same thing – either you experience or you don’t experience. First thing, intellectual understanding is not equal to experience. ”… Or understands inwardly the deep feeling of becoming as a dry leaf to be moved only by the existence itself, then how can one push oneself to breathe or jump or do anything at all but lie flat on the earth and dissolve?”
You will have to do that also – to lie flat. You will have to do that also – to lie flat on the earth. And if you can do that, why can’t you push, jump and breathe? I will tell you one anecdote. It happened, one Zen monk, Dogen, used to tell his disciples, ”Unless you die, you will not be reborn.” So one stupid disciple – and there are always many – thought, ”If this is the key, then I must try it.” So one day he came and did just as you have said. He must have lain with closed eyes, flat out in front of the door of the master, just in the morning when the master was expected to come out for the morning prayer.
The master opened the door and found that his disciple was lying there not breathing, as if dead. The master Dogen said, ”Okay, doing well.” So the disciple opened one eye just to see the expression on the master’s face, and Dogen said, ”Stupid! Dead men don’t open their eyes!” You will have to do that also – to lie flat on the ground – but that will be your doing. And these breathing exercises are to help you so that it can happen and is not your doing. All these techniques of meditation are to help you to come to this realization when suddenly you feel that it is happening – you have fallen on the ground, dissolving.
But that should not be something done on your part, you cannot do it. If it is a doing the whole point is lost. It must be a spontaneous happening. And right now whatsoever you do will not be spontaneous, whatsoever you are doing you have to make effort. And I know that you have to make effort for breathing, for catharsis, for the mantra Hoo – and you have to bring all effort possible. These efforts are not going to become your enlightenment, because enlightenment is never achieved through effort, but these efforts will help you; they will bring you to a point where you can become effortless.
And when you become effortless, enlightenment is always there. You can stop them, but just by stopping them nothing will happen. Continue them, and do them as totally as possible because then you will come to realize sooner that nothing can be achieved through effort. Nothing can be achieved through effort – you have to realize this. I can say this, but this will not be of much help. I know well that just by breathing fast you are not going to enter into nirvana. I know it well.
And just by crying and dancing no one has ever entered there. Even if their door is open they will close it, if they see that you are coming doing Dynamic Meditation they will close the door. This I know well. I have heard, one Christian missionary was giving a sermon to some middle-school students, small boys and girls. After the sermon he asked, ”Those who want to go to heaven should raise their hands.” So all the boys except one raised their hands. Only one boy, someone called Johnny, remained silent.
The missionary asked, ”Don’t you want to go to heaven?” Johnny said, ”Not with this bunch!” So if you go doing Dynamic Meditation even I cannot enter with you, it is impossible. But I know that Dynamic Meditation is not the end, it is just to prepare you so that you can drop automatically. It is to exhaust you and your ego; it is to exhaust your mind, your body; it is to exhaust your individuality. And when your individuality is exhausted completely you will drop on the ground like a dry leaf.
But not like Dogen’s disciple – if he could have done Dynamic Meditation the whole story would have been different. Then there would have been no need to lie down on the ground, he would have fallen on the ground. And if you have to lie down, that shows only that you are withholding yourself, you are not really exhausted. If you simply move totally in whatsoever I am saying to do you will get exhausted. You have a certain amount of energy, a limited amount of energy – that energy can be exhausted. Once exhausted you will become a dry leaf, a dead leaf. When you cannot do anything only then can nondoing happen. While you can do something, nondoing is not possible.
Source: from book “Vedanta: Seven Steps to Samadhi” by Osho
