Paddy was known for his foul language by everyone in his congregation. The parson took him aside on Sunday and said, “Every time you swear you must give five dollars to the nearest stranger. That will cure you soon enough.”
As Paddy left the preacher, he stubbed his toe and then silently handed the five dollars to a woman just entering the church. “Okay,” whispered the woman, “But can you wait until after the service?”