Paddy and his two friends, an Englishman and a Scotsman, got sentenced to five years in jail, but were told that they could have one thing with them that they badly wanted. The Englishman had a big blonde, the Scotsman had bottles of whisky, and Paddy chose packets and packets of cigarettes. Five years came and they were all let out, one by one. The Englishman came out with his blonde, looking absolutely knackered, the Scotsman came out staggering all over, and hiccupping. And last of all out came Paddy, of course, looking very frustrated. And do you know what his first words were? “Have you got a light, anybody?”