{"id":5215,"date":"2018-03-23T15:54:03","date_gmt":"2018-03-23T15:54:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/guruquote.net\/?p=5215"},"modified":"2018-03-23T15:54:23","modified_gmt":"2018-03-23T15:54:23","slug":"gorilla-zoo-died","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guruquote.net\/index.php\/2018\/03\/23\/gorilla-zoo-died\/","title":{"rendered":"A gorilla in the zoo died"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12  mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12 mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<p>A gorilla in the zoo died. His female companion, after a few months, began getting violent as her need for sex increased. The zookeepers decided to get a man to make love to her. They picked up a Polack down on skid row and offered him twenty dollars for the job.<br \/>\nThey muzzled the she-ape, tied her arms to the bars, and let the Polack gingerly into her cage. When the gorilla saw the guy had an erection, she suddenly ripped her arms loose from the bars and began crushing him in her embrace. &#8220;Help!&#8221; he shouted. &#8220;For God&#8217;s sake, help!&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Don&#8217;t worry,&#8221; the keeper shouted back, &#8220;we&#8217;ll get an elephant-gun and shoot her.&#8221; &#8220;No! No! Don&#8217;t shoot her. Just get her muzzle off &#8212; I wanna kiss her!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12 mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-image-obj motopress-text-align-left\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/guruquote.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/oshojokes421.jpg?fit=267%2C403&ssl=1\" title=\"oshojokes421\" alt=\"Kowalski and Olga are making love in the upstairs bedroom. Just as Kowalski is about to start up his machinery, they hear a loud banging noise downstairs. \"What's that?\" asks Olga, jumping up in bed. \"Nothing,\" pants Kowalski. \"Come on, let's get on with it!\" \"No! No way!\" demands Olga. \"No lovemaking until you find out what is going on downstairs.\" Poor Kowalski stumbles downstairs with a very large erection, and flips on the the lights. Suddenly, the cat jumps out of the window. The dog dives under the sofa. And the parrot, trapped in its cage, looks around frantically, then tucks one leg under its wing and screams, \"Wait! Wait, you silly Polack... you wouldn't fuck a cripple would you?\"\" class=\"motopress-image-obj-basic mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right mpce-dsbl-margin-top mpce-dsbl-margin-bottom\" \/><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" ","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[165,451],"tags":[452,2],"class_list":["post-5215","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-osho","category-osho-jokes","tag-jokes","tag-osho"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - 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