{"id":5332,"date":"2018-03-23T17:19:05","date_gmt":"2018-03-23T17:19:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/guruquote.net\/?p=5332"},"modified":"2018-03-23T17:20:42","modified_gmt":"2018-03-23T17:20:42","slug":"paddy-murphy-way-home","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guruquote.net\/index.php\/2018\/03\/23\/paddy-murphy-way-home\/","title":{"rendered":"MacTavish is dead!"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12  mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12 mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<p>Paddy Murphy is on his way home, when he comes across a woman crying hysterically.<br \/>\n&#8220;What is the matter, lady?&#8221; he asks.<br \/>\n&#8220;MacTavish is dead!&#8221; she sobs. &#8220;MacTavish is dead!&#8221;<br \/>\nA few minutes later he comes across another woman sobbing, &#8220;MacTavish is dead! MacTavish is dead!&#8221;<br \/>\nSoon he finds another woman crying the same thing, and then as he approaches the railway crossing he sees a ghastly sight.<br \/>\nA train has run over a man and cut him in pieces. And there on the street next to the body is lying his foot-and-a-half long prick. Several women are standing around crying, &#8220;MacTavish is dead! MacTavish is dead!&#8221;<br \/>\nWhen Paddy arrives home, he says to Maureen, &#8220;I just saw a terrible thing. A train ran over a guy and cut off his pecker. And would you believe it? His prick was eighteen inches long!&#8221; &#8220;My God!&#8221; cries Maureen. &#8220;MacTavish is dead!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mp-row-fluid motopress-row mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-clmn mp-span12 mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right\">\n<div class=\"motopress-image-obj motopress-text-align-left\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/guruquote.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/osho_on_paddyjokes.jpg?fit=250%2C400&ssl=1\" title=\"osho_on_jokes\" alt=\"Old Zeb, the back-woods Virginia farmer, has been screwing one of his favorite pigs for years. Suddenly, Zeb is hit by pangs of guilt and conscience that torture him so much he decides to go and tell the priest about it in confession. Father Fungus is shocked and he really does not know how to handle this one. \"Well,\" says the priest to old Zeb, \"tell me, is the pig male or female?\" \"She's female, of course,\" snorts Zeb. \"What do you think I am -- some kind of a pervert\" class=\"motopress-image-obj-basic mpce-dsbl-margin-left mpce-dsbl-margin-right mpce-dsbl-margin-top mpce-dsbl-margin-bottom\" \/><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" ","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[165,451],"tags":[452,2],"class_list":["post-5332","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-osho","category-osho-jokes","tag-jokes","tag-osho"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>MacTavish is dead! 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